Tickle Your Kitty, Light Your John, Laugh Your Ass Off

Tonight's show is for anyone who masturbates or uses a toilet. Our guests will elevate both performances to the level of art. America's Pleasure Coach is here to show you how to tickle your fancy in a way that'll curl toes and make you swear off members of the opposite sex. Our second guest invented a toilet light that has ended marriage squabbles and potty trained children. And to think, you would have just slept through the episode. Good thing you came to the website.